you can go home again,
you just can't eat there

despite the humidity, the dead cicadas, this slow-ass dial-up internet service at my brother's house and my aching back and rotator cuff, i am happy to be home in cincinnati. i've been here less than 48 hours and i have already seen two of my best friends, interacted with a few relatives and found a house that i must buy--more on that later.

it's all good except for the food. generally the choices here are fast food, faster food, meat, meat and more meat, and cheesy and greasy. not exactly vegetarian-friendly.

i didn't get up until after noon today and it was after five when i finally got around to getting something to eat. i started the day off fixing a bathroom cabinet at my parents' house, then planted them and their canes in the family ford for a little cruise around the burbs. our first stop was the dry cleaners and then we journeyed out at my uncle's house in silverton, about 10 miles away. i rarely see my aunt and uncle when i'm here so it was lovely to see them and a nice treat for the folks since they don't get out much. after that visit i took them to a soul food dive where they ordered fried whiting and some high-fat, sodium-laced sides.

you know i couldn't have that--even though it was smelling pretty damn good.

since i've pretty much weaned myself off of bread and cheese, sandwiches were pretty much out. i had pasta the night before with my BFF&E bo. wasn't feeling a salad and i'm always suspect of eating any ethnic cuisines in the suburbs. i finally settled on some general tsu tofu from this chinese spot in a strip mall not far from my brother's house.

big mistake.

it was greasy and the broccoli was overcooked. and, of course, they looked at me as if i were an alien when i asked if they had brown rice.

brown rice here is white rice soaked in brown gravy.

my brother and his wife had invited me to dinner but only after i had already ordered my take-out. i had to eat it. i was starving and i needed something in my stomach so i could take my pain meds for the whack back and sore arm.

but bonding time is important when you get to be this age because you never know who's going to be here and who's not the next time you swoop into town. i told them i would go with them but that i needed to stop by my friend bo's house to see her grandson first. grandma bo was babysitting and it sounded as though she was having a hard time keeping up with an energetic 1-year-old.

i'm always willing to lend a hand when i can.

i was about three minutes from bo's house when my sister-in-law called and said i had locked them out on their back porch. what? oh, this was too deep. so, i had to make a u-ie and release those caged birds and then head back to bo's. i spent about 20 minutes with her and her grandson before cruising back to my brother's house which is about 10 minutes away.

when i got back to his house there was no one home. my homies had left me.

i grew up in suburban cincinnati, so i don't know the city that well at all. i had a general idea where this restaurant was, but it took me quite a while to find it. by the time i arrived they were half-way through their dinner. i had a glass of domestic pinot noir--the horror of it all--and shared a piece of carrot cake with my sister-in-law. the cake was the best thing i had had all day.

did i mention how much i love being at home? i do, i really, really do for myriad reasons: i never have to overhear any conversations about what's going on in the biz; people are generally friendly even when my road rage shifts into high gear and i'm screaming at them; no one mentioned the 15 pounds i've gained since last summer; i love that people are genuinely happy to see me and likewise; i think it's wonderful that some women think that it's ok to wear pants with whales and ducks on them; and oddly enough, i miss the thunderstorms and how fresh and clean and clear everything is afterwards. we don't get those in l.a.

plus, what's old is really new and that kind of re-energizes me.

the things i don't dig? i haven't been around to see my parents grow old and it's a really jolting experience; my brother not only has no dsl, but no call-waiting, no tivo and no on/off remote for the tv in my room so it feels like i'm living in peoria, circa 1958; i'm also not real keen on the humidity after that horrendous heatwave i just left in l.a. but it's the lack of healthy food choices that gets me the most.

even the wyoming bakery is closed this week because the staff is on vacation! WTF?! so that means no smile cookies for little miki--my one sugary indulgence.

maybe i'm going to have to venture out of the burbs.

or it might be a good time to start that fast.

WWOD (what would oprah do)?

she'd probably buy the house with the pool and hire a cook.

photo: my mother nancy and her cousin marg